Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alive.
So much puke
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
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