Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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