Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
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Im just a social blackout drinker.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
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Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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