and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
My vagina is very pro this idea
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