Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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