East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize