I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
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