I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
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