I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
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