She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I am one with the molecules
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
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