Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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