how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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