Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
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