you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Randomize