I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Randomize