I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
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