I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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