you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize