I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
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