Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
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We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
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New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
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