My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize