I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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