We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize