how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's shark week go big or go home
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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