Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
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