I intend to get homeless drunk
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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