I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
i am craving dick and cupcakes
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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