They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
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That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
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Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
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