Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
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