Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize