new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
The feeling are messing with the penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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