Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Randomize