I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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