That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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