is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
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