And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
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i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
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And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
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