This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
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