How'd it feel making her break her religion?
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
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