Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Randomize