I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
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