My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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