She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize