I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
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