I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
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