No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
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