I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize