I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
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i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
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We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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