OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
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There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
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I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
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