even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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