Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
sex in a hospital.. check
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize